terrible two

Oh! What a joy, an annoying little boy!
My terrible two year old boy!
Ah, what the heck! A pain in the neck!
My terrible two year old boy!

Cryin' and screamin', pushin' and shovin',
Eventually hopin' he'd win.
A battle I'd rather not wonder, nor ponder
The mess I have found myself in.

Do you forget to Send the Memo?

Do you forget to Send the Memo?

Mothers are in charge of several household activities constantly and multi-tasking is the key. There are times I impress myself on this God-given characteristic that I am able to accomplish my share of the household duties flawlessly. Tired and proud, I pat myself on the shoulder.

I do everything except for one thing: inform my husband of my mental notes. Don’t use that box of milk because it’s for breakfast. Come home by lunchtime because I have afternoon plans, which, by the way, includes you. Before we know it,  Houston, we have a problem...crak...crak...crak.

Yes, I forget to send the memo a lot of times.  

Mental Notes

I used to take down a lot of notes. When I was a student, my notebook looked like a reference guide. After having Ozzy, my bad memory was proof of “anesthetic” success of a normal delivery.  I couldn’t remember things even after I write it down. 

So now I go by another rule: If it’s important, I should remember. The power of mental notes. After all, if I can’t remember where I wrote it down, what’s the use of writing it down in the first place?

Travel with Baby

The Day I Brought My Son Halfway Across the World

This was Philippines to Hong Kong. We had bulkhead seats for London and Bermuda. Bulkhead seats are given to passengers with babies which had a lot more room and a space for the baby cot.

     It was a series of an hour and a half flight to Hongkong, then a twelve-hour flight to London, and then a seven-hour flight to Bermuda. Ozzy was a year and seven months old.  We flew three flights, and traveled for two nights and two days. I had an idea it was difficult and that I needed all my strength and sanity to be able to do it. The only thing that made me certain of survival was that if I carried this boy in my belly for nine months, carried him in my arms for a year, and guided his hand for seven months after that, he should consider me home. And where mom is, there is home.

     True to his personality, he wouldn’t sleep on the baby seat and was strapped on my lap for two nights sleeping on my stomach, lap, and legs as he wasn’t very small. I was convinced he was going to get sick with the stress, recycled airplane air, and cold airports so I brought my gamut of preventive and combative medication. But he didn’t get sick and was jumping up and down when we got to my sister-in-law’s house in Bermuda. He was called “Full of Beans” by one of the attendants, and named “the best one of all” by one of the passengers. He’d pop his head and smile at the passengers along the aisles. He enjoyed the different kinds of people he met along the way and the variety of sights to see. I was very proud of my little traveler. He felt safe, confident, and sociable.

     Personally, I felt like I didn't have as much beans as he did. Luckily, I was traveling with family. And so there were people taking care of me along the way: my loving husband who fed me as I hold Ozzy during the plane ride, and guided us around London without getting lost, and my in laws, whose generosity made sure that I never go hungry.

Book Review : First Time Mom by Dr. Kevin Leman

I was hitting the panic button a couple of months ago thinking that I might go nuts at home and that I wasn't contributing significantly to the family. I had a feeling that I'd make better use of my time working and making money.Thank God! My sister-in-law gave me this book and knocked me back to my senses. It's very encouraging to moms who have decided to stay home for their kids. So even if I know that running after the little monster can drive me crazy, I try to hang in there. We always have to be reminded about how we arrived at this decision in the first place. This book feels like a pair of warm socks in winter!

Stay-at-Home moms read on!

Ozzy and Mommy at Horseshoe Beach, Bermuda [Aug 2010]

Top 5 Baby Things

Preparing for a baby is so exciting. It is a time full of hope and anticipation. When I was preparing for Ozzy, I found it helpful that mothers write about the list of things that a new mother should prepare for. I ‘m writing about 5 things we still continue to use after a year and  seven months of caring for my baby boy. I hope this helps other mothers too. 1.       Ten-minute electric sterilizer (Pigeon) -- made it easy for me to clean my baby bottles without worrying about them or watching the time. It automatically turns off and stores the bottles after. I simply wash my bottles and leave it in the sterilizer.  It gave me the convenience of thinking about other things. 2.       Stroller & Baby Basket (Enfant) -- I knew that my baby could get as huge as my husband and heavy. I’m a very small person so I knew I wouldn’t be carrying my son around for very long. The stroller became his bed during his day naps, his changing station (in other people’s houses), his “high chair”, his buggy during our trip outside the country. He practically lives in that chair. His basket and rocker was my husband’s favorite. He could be sitting on the computer and rocking the baby at the same time when Ozzy was very little. London lay over --September 2, 2010 3.      Complete Healthcare Kit (Safety First)— I used everything. The nail clippers first, then the medicine dropper, the nasal aspirator, the medicine spoon. The thermometer was very helpful and quick to use too. It was everything in a bag and I loved it! 4.       Drop Ins (Playtex) – These came very helpful when we go out because I never had to sterilize. The liners are quite expensive and milk would leak out at the nipple/ring area when tipped upside down, but we used it completely during Ondoy when there wasn’t much clean water available, and our trip abroad when facilities were limited. I just make sure I wash the nipple well with warm water. I wouldn’t recommend it for regular use though, because that’s 450+ monthly for liners down the drain too. 5.       Muslin/Lampin (Cotton—not the gauze like material)—Babies make a lot of mess and have to be protected from a lot of things so I could name hundreds of uses. Some uses could be: changing table lining for public places and at home, burping cloth, wipes for snot and spit ups, drying cloth for after washing up etc. I simply pick one up, wipe, and toss it in the laundry bin. Of course baby needs other things too.  And things would differ for different moms. When I was making my own list, I had a page full of ideas from breastfeeding, feeding, clothing, room furniture etc. These are just items I’ve proven useful over the 19 months and will continue to use until Ozzy turns two.

First Time Mom

My husband and I were married for five years before we had a baby. It was quite an experience for both of us.   And truly a strengthening experience for me. I’ve read of other difficult first time mom experiences and mine would’ve been a bit average. Although I had to learn things on my own,  I have totally embraced what I have gone through and claim it as a means to do God’s will. I can manage and accept failure with everything else except being a good mother to my son ozzy and a loving wife to my husband bits. 

Like many things I believe in, I dove into playing this role one hundred percent.  Slowing down with my career and plummeting into a future of earning nothing except my son’s strong sense of family.  It sounds pretty romantic  but in translation, this meant diaper changing every four hours, food flying around during mealtimes, tantrums, conversing with a 1.9 year old who barely made sense, and never having a quiet time, a clean shirt, or the liberty to look (and feel) posh and polished. It was a full time job with no lunch break or punching out. It was both humbling and demanding at the same time.

 It has been months since I have signed my honorable dismissal paper from an institution I’ve had seven memorable years with and I have not yet had the urge to run back. Contrary to how my goals at 31 should be when women in their 30’s are in the most creative time of one’s life.  According to studies women should focus on their work on this creative stage because it’s the time they are offered promising career stability. Shouldn’t I be taking advantage of that? Or should I take this opportunity to raise my child and be there every time he needs to be hugged, reprimanded, or encouraged? Or can I successfully schedule these opportunities until after 5pm or only on the weekends?

The way I look at it, I’m investing time and certainly resources to raise my son by getting to know him and vice versa. This understanding of one another will allow us to relate better to each other through tough times.  When I was working, I would spend a lot of time looking for educational toys. Now, my son and I spend more time taking toys apart rather than shopping for more. It’s an interest of his. Rather than wondering why his toys don’t last long enough, I recognized his true motivation is to see how toys work and how they hold together. It’s a relationship I have to work on myself. I’ve had to learn his language. This makes a lot of difference for me and a world of difference for him to know that his mom understands him.